The Last time

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Have you ever thought with every First time that happens there’s always a last? Me neither until yesterday….

Last night i cuddled Paris and put him to bed for the last time as a One year old . As i sat and watched him fall to sleep stroking his head it dawned on me that with so many beginnings there are so many last times that we don’t even notice.

And i began to think .

To think about all the last times and how if i knew they were going to be that would i have changed anything …  Even this week there’s been so many last times and it saddened me …..

Moving Thandie into her big girls bed this week – never did i think it was the last time she’d call mamma i’m awake from her cot

The dummy fairy came this week to take Thandies DDs  – Never again will i be out on a night out with a handbag filled of make up and  random dummies

Yesterday was the last time i had a one year old , 2 year old and 6 year old

Yesterday was the last time i could say i had a baby – I now have toddlers

This week both Thandie and Paris moved classes in nursery. Never again will i step foot in the baby room

Jasmine moved up a level in ballet this week  – Never again will i have a tiny ballerina

With all these things came an overwhelming sense to treasure every moment that we have with our children because they don’t last long

There will be a last time they

.. call you mummy instead of mum

… creep into your bed in the early hours

… kiss you goodbye at the school gate

… hold your hand in public

… take a feed from you

I found this beautiful piece that i just had to share with you because were all guilty of wishing away the time

 

The Last Time – author unknown

From the moment you hold your baby in your arms you will never be the same

You might long for the person you were before When you had freedom and time
And nothing in particular to worry about

You will know tiredness like you never knew it before Days will run into days that are exactly the same
Full of feedings and burping
Nappy changes and crying

Whining and fighting
Naps or a lack of naps
It might seem like a never-ending cycle

But don’t forget…

There is a last time for everything
There will come a time when you will feed your baby for the very last time They will fall asleep on you after a long day
And it will be the last time you ever hold your sleeping child

One day you will carry them on your hip then set them down And never pick them up that way again
You will scrub their hair in the bath for one last time
And from that day on they will want to bathe alone

They will hold your hand to cross the road
Then will never reach for it again
They will creep into your room at midnight for cuddles And it will be the last night you ever wake to this

One afternoon you will sing “the wheels on the bus” and do all the actions Then never sing them that song again

They will kiss you goodbye at the school gate
The next day they will ask to walk to the gate alone

You will read a final bedtime story and wipe your last dirty face They will run to you with arms raised for the very last time.

The thing is, you won’t even know it’s the last time
Until there are no more times. And even then, it will take you a while to realize.

So while you are living in these times, remember there are only so many of them and when they are gone, you will yearn for just one more day of them.
For one last time.

Until tomorrow lovelies 

lots of love Rach xxx 

p.s Thank you so much for all the birthday love for Paris. You’re all so super sweet xxxx

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33 Comments

  1. Andrea says:

    You’re SO right – I needed this reminder after 3 weeks of being up 4 or 5 times a night with ill children – I was starting to get pretty pissed off (and shattered!) – this will give me a few more nights of patience… x

    1. Rachael Lalji says:

      Oh no I hope they’re ok now babe – gets you thinking doesn’t it – why can’t they stay little forever

  2. Donna says:

    I just wanted to say that I am really loving your blogs – I would never normally comment but you seem very genuine and that is coming across more and more. Looking forward to the next one… x

    1. Rachael Lalji says:

      Thank you so much babe xxx

  3. Clare Blanchard says:

    Lovely piece and so very true. Cant believe my son will be leaving school this year. Doesnt seem 5 minuets ago we were walking through the school gates

  4. Julesjess says:

    How lovely really made me think of all the last times

  5. corinne & kirsty says:

    I had never thought about it. But when it is a parent, this must be so relatable! A lot of first time but so many last time too!

  6. Cia Black says:

    It’s so true, we look so forward to the 1st time we fail to think of how it could be the last time. This really makes you stop and think about the moments happening.

  7. Annie says:

    This is such a beautiful post! Live every day as though it is your last. Seize the day, and you’ll have a heart full of amazing memories.

  8. Shell says:

    Aww this post is just so sweet and reminds me of how over the years I have experienced this with both my boys… As a Mama I absolutely relate to how you’re feeling 🙂

  9. Marnie says:

    Thank you for reminding me to cherish every moment! I don’t have kids yet, but I can still relate to your post. I am guilty of wishing my time away and hoping for the hours to go by faster. But I now know that there are so many precious moments that I may miss, and that is something that I really want to change.

  10. Daria says:

    You describe your motherhood so beautifully, it is really touching. I also like how clean and pretty your entire blog is.
    Daria
    https://www.californiachic.net

  11. Ithfifi says:

    I don’t think I’ve ever really thought about this way, its kind of nice to look back sometimes. Looking forward is great but like Marnie said, I sometimes feel like I wishing my life away looking forward to things in the future. I think true gratitude of what we have in our lives requires us to think both ways.

  12. Wiola says:

    That post inspires to really think about life… that everything changes so fast… and there first and last times around, all the time.. this is sad. It shows us there’s never a second chance to re-live the same moment in the future…

  13. Amanda says:

    Aww my heart breaks for you <3. This is so sweet. I guess this is a common theme amongst mothers. Just remember, it may be the last time for some things, but there will be so many first times for things. So much to look forward to!

  14. Tiffany says:

    I wrote about this when I thought my son was my last baby and then again with my last baby. It’s such a bittersweet moment, to experience those first milestones for the last time!

  15. jossy says:

    This is just so beautiful. I cant imagine as i don’t have any kids of my own but you describe it with detail which makes me anxious to how mine first will be like

  16. Indu says:

    Though I do not have kids but I was so emotional reading your lines from heart.

  17. Melanie williams says:

    What a beautiful read – I love this. So much detail and I dont even have children, but loved this x

  18. Stephanie Jeannot says:

    Awww! You sound like such a great mother. Your children are lucky to have you in their life. Happy birthday to Paris. God bless you all!

  19. Cindy says:

    We definitely need to slow down and enjoy every day, every moment. Things change quickly, but gratitude can help slow them down a little.

  20. Veronica@inveronicascorner says:

    Awe happy birthday to your little one! What a great reminder to cherish every moment because the time does fly by so quickly.

  21. Flora the Sweaterist says:

    Such a lovely reminder! I don’t have kids, but I have a little sister and you just made me wonder about our lasts.
    Btw, even as grown ups, we never stopped calling our mom “mommy.” 😉

    Happy birthday to Paris!

  22. mily jain says:

    Happy birthday to Paris..It is always so hard to let go of small routines we develop in our daily lives so this must definitely be a bittersweet feeling…

  23. Emily Leary says:

    This is so true. We spend so much time thinking about the firsts that we never really consider the lasts. A reminder to live in the moment a little more!

  24. Rachel says:

    This is such a humbling post. Very true and makes you think. Children grow up too fast and every day just flies by!

  25. Shubhada Bhide says:

    That is so touching! A very beautiful piece that only parents can relate! the words are so lovely!

  26. Paola says:

    I would probably more focus on the “first times”, the new beginnings….the first time she will wall, the first time she will be kissing someone, the first time she will fall in love, the first time she is not going to need you anymore, the first time she will tell ” thank you for what you have done”.

  27. Jagriti Roy says:

    Such a beautiful blog. This article can be counted among the most loving blogs I have ever read.. The mother child bond is really priceless and every single minute out there is like precious gem.. Sometimes I feel so honoured to be a woman because I am blessed to experience motherhood, the most holy gift of the world..

  28. Ellie Plummer says:

    Such a beautiful post and so beautiful that you get to watch your child grow up. I do hope that time slows down a bit so we can all have more time to appreciate things.

  29. mj says:

    This is a very heart warming post, I really felt the emotion. I have my 4 month old baby and she’s growing so fast, my husband and I made sure to make the best of her baby years, every moment that we make with her while she’s still an infant. This just made me realize that time is very precious you have to make the best out of it.

  30. victoria says:

    There’s always a first and last time for everything. These are all phases and as they move from one phase to another the experiences are varied. Go ahead and enjoy all of them, while being the supermom that you are.

  31. Ariel says:

    I don’t even have kids yet and I am not looking forward to watching them grow up so fast. I wish all firsts never turned into lasts, but I guess that is the way life works. This was a beautiful story!

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